JustAGuy

Happy Birthday HMK! Glad you get a proper thread instead of my premature release of birthday wishes!

Lao Tzu said "he who knows that enough is enough will always have enough." But enough is never enough of the Stuff.

I think we talked about this years ago. I HAVE seen, though not for decades. I thought it was legitimately great. Horror movie spoof of commercialism, and the scenes where the kid's brainwashed family are going to use force to make him eat it are for real scary! Kind of puts a weird spin on the session in retrospect.

And now I have two green circles, neither from a Mistress. Green circles are the new blue balls.

Yes. Sorry this little green circle isn't from a Mistress.

Honored to have a costume request repeat! And also sorry I seem to have gotten a bunch of people confused on when HMK's actual birthday is!

I spent the weekend with family. My nephews were particularly adorable, we drew monsters!

Have you ever been so afraid of accidentally wishing someone a belated birthday that you celebrated their birthday almost a month early? Well that's what happened to me with Head Mistress Kang this year. I knew she was going to be busy around her actual birthday, so she told me to celebrate in May. Unfortunately, I wasn't available, and neither was Tommy the Birthday Clown, so this time I had to send my pal Useless the Unicorn! Well, I tell a lie, I actually did show up to the Fortress. Jessy wanted to do dinner early so we opened our session with Jessy serving me a little appetizer...an entire can of pink marshmallow fluff! I can only assume she was inspired by my piggy adventures with Mistress Ito! No kidding, I was ordered NOT to disrobe (first time I can remember that at the Fortress) but just to remove my shoes, go sit on the floor in the Purple Room, and using a cheapo plastic spoon that wanted to bend back under any pressure at all, eat an entire jar of pink marshmallow fluff! When that was done, Jessy told me she had an even more special surprise...a second jar of pink marshmallow fluff! I am not even kidding, this is what happened! Jessy took a little taste for herself (she had literally never eaten it before and made me eat two entire jars!) and said (accurately) that it tasted like cake icing! After this, we went straight to dinner. I was a bit worried about how my stomach would feel, but luckily, Jessy ordered me a nice gin martini to settle my stomach. Never mind that I hate gin martinis (I used to like gin and tonic but generally just don't like clear liquor at all), but this one was EXTRA nasty. She told me to water it down and get through it as she drank a cocktail she actually enjoyed! But from there everything was actually amazing, she had oysters as an appetizer, I had shrimp cocktail (Jessy's choice for me, of course) and lobster spaghetti (also her choice). It was excellent. We had a good conversation. I told her about my new Fortress crush...but it's gonna stay a secret on the Forum! Well, I had warned the Head Mistress in email that due to some stuff I had scheduled early next week, I was not down for the kind of heavy sessions I did years ago. I still remember being DESTROYED by Jessy when I first met her a decade ago...being taken way beyond my existing limits for physical suffering and reaching heights of helplessness and submission I still chase today. But this time I couldn't hang, and instead sent Useless the Unicorn! Back at the Fortress, Useless took over and....well...danced for Head Mistress Kang! There was a really vague effort to teach Useless some Cantonese but really it was just some pole dancing, a bit of galavanting on all-fours, and some lively unicorn music. To my great surprise, Useless told me Jessy did not actually beat him or punch him, and the Useless costume...I mean Useless' Unicorn body ended the scene fully intact! Jessy sent me a video afterwards, but Useless got to see a video while he was there that captured Jessy laughing. And man, there is no sound quite like Jessy just completely losing it laughing! Luckily for Useless, he didn't experience one of my key Fortress memories, getting Jessy to lose her shit laughing at a restaurant, and then unexpectedly having her dig a pen into my palm hard while whispering "don't scream." Maybe Useless just didn't amuse her as much as I did. Anyway, I also gave Jessy this lovely unicorn balloon! Actually, no, I saw this balloon when I got home and remembered that I was planning to buy one and forgot. But a picture is almost as good! Anyway, happy early birthday Jessy! From me, and Useless, and Tommy the Birthday Clown, and the whole Forum I'm sure!

MAY THE FOURTH BE WITH YOU! Nine years later and this amazing link HMK found is still going strong. I have new highlights I never even noticed before (there are six pages of panels) 39 Chinese Star Wars Tuscan Raiders are even more racist than the originals were (they were kinda racist let's be honest) 50 Obi-Wan flashes back to Chinese Star Wars Jedi Knights, who are way the fuck cooler than the non-Chinese Star Wars ones 51 - 52 The Mos Eisley Cantina serves J&B Scotch 78 Darth Vader Hitler-salutes an army of Boba Fetts 80 TIE Fighters replaced by F-14s 81 Giant Chewbacca! 83 Can anyone show me to the door? 140 Brother and Sister Marriage!?

My favorite place for chicken tendies also does a nice sundae! I'm starting to feel like I am doing PR for them!

Oh wow, I love the look on your face in the third picture from the top! "What, you've never seen a girl in lingerie before? What kind of a dork are you?"

Perfectly named. Your pictures have that "bratty girl from high school who would never talk to you but oh man what you wouldn't do for her" energy. I'm sure you are far, far more than that but good god, I can just see you in a private school uniform, ordering me to do all of your homework and not to dare tell anyone that you spoke to me!