job1617

Going through the mad minute in the Fortress with a cane forever scarred me. I love and fear the cane at the same time.

Abandoned child kept in the basement for the sadistic pleasure of my captor. The emotional torment of being alone combined with torture makes for good stockholm syndrome.

Realizing you are powerless is a feeling of complete freedom. I need not be concerned about anything in my former life. Everything is now at the direction of my Mistress. I no longer have to think. I merely obey. My feelings are of complete trust and safety for her to take me on this journey. She controls my thoughts. She dictates my actions. Only when I am powerless I am truly free.

As a first timer I recommend a list of the things you want to explore. It does not have to follow specific scenarios unless that is what you want. When I started It was 2-3 things I wanted to try and then grew with more experience. Keep it simple with what you like. Two hours may be good for a first time. The Fortress Mistresses are excellent communicators. You will have time to get to know them. Share your interests. Then go at a pace that is comfortable for you. I am glad you are taking the plunge. Nerve racking but a lifetime of rewards await. Good luck!

Harsh words can crush a sub even more than any physical instrument. I love verbal humiliation.

I am shy but most Mistresses are intuitive. They can see right through me. They know my darkest fantasies and wield that knowledge.

I usually role play but have never quit in the middle. I don't use a detailed plan. Just an outline so my MIstress can take it where she wants to. I find that works best.

The Piano Teacher and The Night Porter.

A reverse of the film The Piano Teacher would make a good role play.

I am willing to go through what MIstress Kang calls the mad minute. Fast unrelenting cane strokes for one minute. I went through it once and I was completely shattered afterwards. All to hear my MIstress tell me I was a good boy.

I recommend booking an hour since this is your first time. The ideas you mentioned could absolutely be fulfilled in that time. I would communicate those ideas in an email or phone call. The Fortress is superb at pairing you with a Mistress if you don't have one already. My advice is to go slow and let is build organically. Your Domme will go at the pace you set. There are also words you can use to slow down or stop if things get intense. We have all had a first time. Good luck! Life is too short to not experience all it has to offer.

I love being spat on or directly into my mouth. It is so hot and degrading. I also have done mastication at the Fortress where a Mistress chewed fresh fruit and spat it into my mouth. To be fed with her bodily fluids was a HUGE turn on.

Pray to whatever deity you can if that gives you some solace. You will be crushed regardless. Acceptance of that is probably the way to go.

I love seeing myself in the mirror to be reminded of what I truly am when stripped down physically and emotionally.