Not a service sub, but-

[ConsentOptional]

One day a Mistress asked me to assemble a complicated piece of exercise equipment, one of these swiss army knife all-things-to-all-people fitness centers.  There I was with my tool kit and the downloaded PDF of the assembly instructions.  And wearing a fishnet body stocking and locked in chastity.  And gagged for the 1st hour, if I recall.  Took about 2 1/2.

 

I had also brought several magazines and a bottle of wine (as directed).  From time to time she would compliment my progress or note the contrast between my attire and the task at hand.  But mostly she read and, I think, watched a documentary.  I avoided looking at her.  It wasn't a big protocol thing.  Just needed to get on with it, and would quickly fall into reverie if not focused.

 

When I was done, I gave her a massage.  No groping, mind you.  And still locked in chastity and dressed à la slut.  Not gagged but in kind of a dreamy state where I tend to be quiet anyway.

 

The whole experience was strangely therapeutic and pleasantly tranquil.  I definitely  don't identify as a service oriented sub.  I'm as close to addicted to bondage as one can be.  Service is a bit of a logistical issue when you are secured at 4 (or 5..) points.

 

But it was and eye-opener.  I could compare it to "forced feminization" to which I was abruptly exposed without ever mentioning it, asking for it, musing aloud about it, etc.  I had in fact listed as a "please don't" for quite a while. 

 

The link between the two - and I am not qualified to do more than make a guess - is in the elaboration of the roles.  I have a major thing for nonconsent (see screen name...).  Both these two experiences fall into the category of "you are what we say you are."  Also possibly that I come at my interests seeking relief from a stressful other life where I need to be more dominant than I feel suited for.  So the "just listen, obey and don't try to understand, boy" aspect of the experience struck more of a chord than I would ever have expected.

 

It's humbling to find yourself wrong about something you think you understand.  But the good kind.

[Jung's Jewboy]

I have always strongly identified as a service-oriented submissive.  I found service to be very tranquil and calming too.  There's something about serving a woman unselfishly and being useful to her thats very satisfying.

 

I've had some experience with this intermittently but more long term years back.

 

In my mid-40s I served a woman in her late 50's.  We met through very vanilla sources but I think we knew the others nature very quickly.  Sensed it in our initial phone conversations and our first in-person meeting cemented it. It was a brunch with her, a colleague and me and in retrospect I was being 'vetted'.

 

Before we left her colleague a few blocks later seemed to give her 'approval' of me non-verbally.  (if there's an interest, I'll share more.  This is not a 'story' thankfully)

[ConsentOptional]

Yes I'd be interested if you wouldn't mind. It's another thing I've been wrong about. If I do find a Mistress the first thing she will say to me is, "You think too much." And hopefully she will make me stop...

[Outcast]

I don't think there's anything tranquil about putting together equipment. I'd be pulling my hair out wanting to break shit

[ConsentOptional]

I don't think there's anything tranquil about putting together equipment. I'd be pulling my hair out wanting to break shit

 

Yes, in most cases I agree. 

 

The most interesting, appealing but also frightening aspect of submission for someone like me who has resisted, self-sabotaged, tried to tell himself that he couldn't possibly be submissive is this: it matters less what I am asked to do than who asks me to do it.  I have glimpsed that I can find peace of mind in submission. 

 

But so far it has eluded me; or I have eluded it.  But there are some forces of nature for whom my supposed "elusiveness" is merely amusing.