applicant11

On the day of a session, I like to imagine what will happen. I'll re-read the emails I've sent requesting activities and think about them to help get excited for the session. As the session time gets near, I (like most here) end up showing up early, and end up taking a walk around the area. By this point, I am a mix of nervous and excited. The walk helps to burn up some of that excited nervous energy beforehand. I also grab a drink and a snack from the nearby coffee shop, one of my favorite places. Every time I'm there, I wonder if the employees know that some of their customers are waiting to session nearby and if they know what truly goes on just a short distance away. For me, this coffee shop was one of my favorite places before I ever visited the fortress, but this particular one is now bound up in my memory with a dual significance. Right before the session, I have to mentally calm myself and clear my mind. The closest feeling I can think of to describe it is that of a kid entering a toy store and told he can buy whatever he likes.

I think that it would be interesting to explore both a dominant and submissive role while in a female body. As for the other player, I am not entirely sure, but it might be fun to dominate male and female subs while in a female body, as well as submitting to both male and female dom(me)s as a female sub. As a man, I don't feel any interest in playing with other men, but I wonder if that mindset would carry over in this thought experiment. Would I have a desire to only dominate men as a dominant female? I would be interested to see how and in what ways my thinking shifts. I could compare and contrast how strap-on play as a dominant woman would feel as compared to what it's like doing it naturally as a man... that would be a very interesting thing to explore. Or, how would I feel as a physically smaller (but dominant) woman beating a physically larger (but submissive) man? In a session, I can lose myself and forget about my size and strength and mentally fall into a space as the 'weaker' one in the dynamic, but I wonder how it would feel on the other side of that. Ladies, in a session with a man who is much larger who submits, what does it feel like to bend him to your will? Is it more satisfying to bend a man to your will who is large and physically imposing as compared to another man?

Not dirty, definitely sexual, also degrading. Perfect for a BDSM context. Where would I want it? Only in my mouth. For me, the appeal is that it's very intimate and reinforces the D/s dynamic. To illustrate: Prior to play, the girl I was seeing made us each a cup of coffee. We sipped coffee and chatted for a bit, and then she sprung her D/s trap on me pushing me flat onto my back face up on the couch. After a number of activities, I mentioned that I was thirsty. "Do you want some coffee?" she asked me, in an innocent voice. Naively, I believed that I would sit up and she would hand me my cup to take a sip. As I attempted to sit up, nope, she shoved me back down, grabbed her cup, took a mouthful and very very slowly spit it into my mouth while making eye contact with the most evil grin ever. Now I want girls to spit in my mouth... 🫠

I won't make it easy. It will take some work to get me that far. On the other hand, the thought of being mentally fried, barely hanging on is exactly where I want to be in a session... I might have to make some personnel adjustments to my next session.

What a wonderful thing to say. That should be on your Players page!

As I have a preference for impact... Bastinado (caning the bottoms of the feet) is something I cannot resist nearly as well as impact anywhere else. Strike me anywhere else and it will take 2x the force to achieve the same level of pain as bastinado in my estimation. Nipple clamps - leave them on for an extended period of time. It hurts a bit at the beginning, then starts to dull, but after enough time, it hurts intensely. The worst (or best?) part is the fact that by this point, removing them does not in fact relieve the pain but increase it as blood flow re-enters the previously compressed tissue. Now, the nipples are 10x more sensitive and lightly flicking, squeezing, or rolling them is excruciating. However, this sensation quickly fades. To bring it all back, simply put them back on and start again... Evil sticks - I have not yet seen one at the Fortress (maybe this ends up causing them to be stocked! hahaha) but it has the 'bite' sensation of a whip while being relatively tiny and utterly simple to use by comparison. A whip can be unwieldy, requires space to swing it properly, tricky to aim, and required considerable practice to use effectively in a session to achieve the effect. An evil stick has none of these issues and produces an equal amount of stinging pain, if not more depending on the type of carbon fiber used. Very much worth a try if you like impact.

I don't know if it's an "appeal" for me, but the interesting part of it for me is that in my opinion, our clothing is our "armor" in social contexts, so-to-speak. Clothing conveys a message, especially in a BDSM dynamic. Sometimes clothes are social armor in an explicit sense, such as when people were T-shirts with logos or quotes. There's the message and the subtext. "I'm wearing this brand, and this brand is known for this feeling, so associate that feeling with me." Or maybe you're not wearing something so obvious, like a button-up collared shirt and slacks. However, this still sends a message. It could signal membership in a group, "I'm like all the other people in collared shirts and slacks" or it could convey a personal sense of style. In this realm of BDSM, the leather, latex, heels, stockings, etc. usually convey a message of dominance with a subtext of maximum female power, "Not only am I sexy, but I can use it to control you - submit!" Conversely, the lack of clothing to me feels like power stripped away (figuratively and literally). I have no armor, I have no defenses, I am naked. I am vulnerable. In a private BDSM session, maybe the nakedness serves a practical purpose - I am physically vulnerable to impact and other things. In a social setting, I'm mentally vulnerable - who is looking? are they judging me? are they laughing at me? what do they think of me? With clothes, we control how we appear in social settings, but without them we do not. In addition, it's likely heightened by the fact that everyone else is clothed. In such an exibitionist setting, for example, I am vulnerable and everyone else isn't, which can amplify a D/s power dynamic, I think.

Hmm... I actually do not enjoy looking at my reflection, especially during a session. Some of it is for the reasons you mentioned (confusion & shame) but in my case it can snap me out of subspace during a session which I do not like. My favorite thing during a session is how I feel during increasingly intense impact play. I have a bit of a tolerance to impact, but as time progresses, the stress and pain from the strikes start to build up, and as the strikes keep coming in volume and intensity, I can feel my mental walls break down one-by-one. My ability to 'grin and bear it' through the main starts to weaken. At the start of impact, maybe my only reaction is a twitch or a small grunt. Eventually, twitches become shaking and grunts progress to yelling and eventually to screaming. Toward the crescendo of an impact session, as my walls come down, it feels like a mental version of tunnel vision - everything else just fades out and all I can feel are the sting, burn, and ache of the strikes. Eventually, I have no more defenses left and I'm mentally "raw" even light touches inspire an involuntary jump and a wail the same as the worst cane strike could. Thoughts cease to be and I can only feel, and only in the moment. It's a wonderful feeling.

I prefer to just be called by my name. I'm not interested in degrading talk in session. I know it's a common feature in most of the media in the BDSM space, but it's a bit off-putting to me. I prefer encouragement and praise rather than the insults or the verbal attempts to tear me down. Sometimes, the degrading talk can take me out of subspace. I don't mind demanding language, or even being told to do something considered degrading, but the whole "yeah bitch you're so pathetic you slut" just doesn't do it for me, and usually snaps me out of subspace. Just call me by my name and tell me to do the degrading act sweetly! ha

I had underestimated how effective plastic wrap would be as a restraint until I tried it. After all, I can tear it in my hands with little effort, how hard could this be? However, after being encased in plastic wrap I found that it has absolutely no give. Unlike rope, where there must be a bit of slack to allow for circulation, and where you're only attached at a few points, the plastic wrap basically freezes you in place. I couldn't wiggle your arms, legs, hands at all, not even a fraction of an inch. As someone who likes restraint, this was a new level of intensity. If you like restraint, it's wonderful. One thing that I did not enjoy, however, was the sweat. Not so much that it made me sweaty, but that during the session as I was "rolled" into a new position, all the sweat flooded my head area, filling my eyes and ears. It was like someone dunked my head into salt water. The fact that it got into my ears also made it impossible to hear. For some, perhaps this is a plus, but for me, I was not a fan. Also, the mumification in plastic wrap allows for maximum access during impact play - nothing is in the Mistress way like a pole or a bench, and the wrap is too thin to dull any sort of hard strike from anything. Wonderful.

I agree with job1617 is important, but for different reasons. I usually have very physically and mentally demanding sessions and after having some bad subdrop experiences I've read up on how to lessen the effects. Not to get all science on everyone, but there's alot of biochemistry at play during and after a session. For instance, I know that my adrenaline is very high during prolonged impact play, and that if I don't take steps to manage the crash afterwards, it's pretty bad. Some of this is similar to what you might simply do after a tough gym workout - drink lots of water, replenish electrolytes and energy through eating the right foods (protein rich foods like yogurt, some sugary/carb foods like potato chips or a candy bar to combat fatigue). There's also very much an emotional aspect as well as a physical aspect, though this emotional aspect is triggered neurochemically since during a session, I'm playing with adrenaline, dopamine, and serotonin and post-session, all of these levels "normalize" quite abruptly which can trigger strange emotions. Knowing is half the battle - now that I know why I might feel certain emotions, I can better place them in context, but dedicated aftercare is best to help reduce the effects. Hugging and chatting for a bit help here since it helps with oxytocin and helps to "balance things out". That's been my experience, but I also acknowledge that everyone has different sessions involving different activities. If you're into impact, watch out for sub drop.