Second Thoughts

[akiravn1]

To any of the Mistresses at The Fortress,

Have you ever been involved in a session that you had second thoughts about doing and in hindsight, for whatever the reason, actually regretted participating in? I was just wondering if this is an extremely rare occurrence.

[Guest]

A difficult question to answer. In my opinion, I don't necessarily have second thoughts. I sometimes feel that it is a little more difficult to "read" what a sub wants. I truly believe that a good domme can intuitively understand the desires and find the right balance of pain, pleasure, and fantasy. Based on facial expression, verbal sounds and physical movements helps to lead the session successfully. But in rare cases, I don't feel I can "sense the meaning." I find that some need to be led or experience more to understand themselves/identity as a submissive. They may desire to be a sub but need more knowledge about the culture. So, not necessarily "Second Thoughts" but maybe more challenging sessions with lots to explore and learn about for both Sub and Domme. Heady, isn't it?

[Milkdud]

Goddess Minnie,

Great post. You are obviously very skilled at reading men and one of the most empathic persons with whom I have played. A sub must kknow himself enough to communicate his fantasies clearly. Its not easy to do but really important to having a good scene. The vast majority of my experience has been in the non-pro aspect of the BDSM culture but the importance of communication bottom-to-top is the same. Sometimes it can be about exploration and discovery rather then fulfillment. Of course, being a switch helps understand this.

 

D/leatherwings

[akiravn1]

Dear M. Chan,

Thank you for your input, it was very heady. That was an extremely insightful response, you did help to give me more of an understanding regarding my question. The lack of experience in a sub could make the direction of any particular session a little bit harder to determine. I can see where this might play more into the hands of a certain degree of frustration rather than second thoughts or regret. Plus you being a switch, can see and experience everything from both sides, so I feel you are very qualified to speak for both players. I have actually learned a lot from this Forum.

[Guest]

I don't usually have regrets or second thoughts about what I did, but I *do* have thoughts of what I wish I did do but didn't have time or know it would work.

[akiravn1]

Dear MJK,

That definitely sounds like your nefarious side coming through. :twisted: I don't dare ask what these thoughts or ideas might have been, but I definitely love it!