Mistress Kang Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommygermany Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? Dear Ms. Kang, I have some friends that I know for about 16 years now... I had a crush on each of them... none though ever wanted to be with me, but all said I was such a good friend, they would not want to miss... so they put me in that either platonic or not at all situation... I tried to keep them as friends, but actually over the last year they almost all vanished away... they moved on... and don't need me as friend anymore... they repied, when I wished merry christmas or happy new year.... but they never initiated a conversation ... so at the moment all I have is nothingness... that might be a reason, why I am not as active even here anymore... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? Dear Ms. Kang: Perhaps in the time of Plato or perhaps if both parties have some higher religious convictions that makes celibacy or the absence of mutual sexual satisfaction a lofty ideal. In this society a true platonic relationship would be very rare although it would be very easy to self-proclaim or self-diagnose a sex free relationship as platonic. I would suspect that most platonic relationships, when subject to deeper examination, would reveal issues, dysfunctions, deceptions and factual circumstances that belie the true definition of platonic. The only accommodation I may have ever had to the concept of platonic is wanting sex with a girl and hanging in there despite her repeated refusals to have sex with me. That would be a failure of non-platonic love that could default to the definition of platonic before the whole thing crashed and burned. My first reaction to the question was to describe most marriages after a couple of kids and financial stress as platonic. Ms. Kang, I suspect this question is more than academic to you. Dannyboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
questionmarks Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 I realize now that I find all of my closest female friends attractive, whether or not I have any strong desire to try to get in the sack with them. Does the mere fact of finding someone fuckable rule out being *truly* platonic? ...that sort of sounds like a question Archer would ask, so I'll take it that the answer is obvious. But I do have some female friends who I'm not attracted to... so... yes? I regret making it this far in life without any fuck buddies. I'll have to try to do something about that at some point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 Dear Ms. Kang, I have some friends that I know for about 16 years now... I had a crush on each of them... none though ever wanted to be with me, but all said I was such a good friend, they would not want to miss... so they put me in that either platonic or not at all situation... I tried to keep them as friends, but actually over the last year they almost all vanished away... they moved on... and don't need me as friend anymore... they repied, when I wished merry christmas or happy new year.... but they never initiated a conversation ... so at the moment all I have is nothingness... that might be a reason, why I am not as active even here anymore... That was actually a very sad and honest reveal. So basically you're saying platonic relationships DON'T exist. A negative POV is "all you have is nothingness" A positive POV is: you will have room in your head for new possibilities. I say "head" and not "life" because everything starts and ends in your head, not your "life". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 Dear Ms. Kang: Perhaps in the time of Plato or perhaps if both parties have some higher religious convictions that makes celibacy or the absence of mutual sexual satisfaction a lofty ideal. In this society a true platonic relationship would be very rare although it would be very easy to self-proclaim or self-diagnose a sex free relationship as platonic. I would suspect that most platonic relationships, when subject to deeper examination, would reveal issues, dysfunctions, deceptions and factual circumstances that belie the true definition of platonic. The only accommodation I may have ever had to the concept of platonic is wanting sex with a girl and hanging in there despite her repeated refusals to have sex with me. That would be a failure of non-platonic love that could default to the definition of platonic before the whole thing crashed and burned. My first reaction to the question was to describe most marriages after a couple of kids and financial stress as platonic. Ms. Kang, I suspect this question is more than academic to you. Dannyboy I would agree with your POVs point for point. None of those are truly platonic relationships- I don't even think your last example would qualify because the glue to those relationships would not be friendship. Ehh, it's purely an academic affirmation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 I realize now that I find all of my closest female friends attractive, whether or not I have any strong desire to try to get in the sack with them. Does the mere fact of finding someone fuckable rule out being *truly* platonic? ...that sort of sounds like a question Archer would ask, so I'll take it that the answer is obvious. But I do have some female friends who I'm not attracted to... so... yes? I regret making it this far in life without any fuck buddies. I'll have to try to do something about that at some point. Archer was an awesome show- there needs to be more!! Pam reminds me of Jillian from Workaholics if she were more aggressive. What a great human punching bag Woodhouse makes. That's really interesting that you have female friends you don't want to fuck. Do you know if they want to perhaps gingerly jump your bones? LOL I NEED TO KNOW!!! Fuckbuddies are available a dime a dozen- is Tinder still a thing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommygermany Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 That was actually a very sad and honest reveal. So basically you're saying platonic relationships DON'T exist. A negative POV is "all you have is nothingness" A positive POV is: you will have room in your head for new possibilities. I say "head" and not "life" because everything starts and ends in your head, not your "life". Thank You Ms. Kang, I know that, and I will get to that POV... but at the moment those lost friends still feel like a loss... and with them gone, you now are my longest running and most often "dated" relationship Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeriko13 Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? I think its about setting expectations. I have plenty of friendships that are strictly platonic, even as I find them attractive. I just don't need to go there with them. They fulfill me in other ways; intellectually, spiritually, civicly, or professionally. I don't need to go to them to find romance and I have no expectations (or desire, really) to expand my relationship with them beyond that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpcpat Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 There are 50 shades of platonic. A few I've experienced: -The forbidden ones you just never think of that way: relatives, for example. -The "it's just a bad idea" - like people you work with and you refuse to think of each other that way. More enforced platonic than anything but can lead to: -Friends after we worked together, never got curious or -Wondered what it would be like, tried a date, then realized we were completely incompatible that way - this is maybe the truest platonic, because any attraction was explored, but rejected and the friendship got stronger. One platonic relationship was with a drinking buddy because she had a boyfriend, then husband. When they divorced, she offered "friends with benefits," but I'm not that type. Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
questionmarks Posted April 2, 2016 Report Share Posted April 2, 2016 Archer was an awesome show- there needs to be more!! Pam reminds me of Jillian from Workaholics if she were more aggressive. What a great human punching bag Woodhouse makes. That's really interesting that you have female friends you don't want to fuck. Do you know if they want to perhaps gingerly jump your bones? LOL I NEED TO KNOW!!! Fuckbuddies are available a dime a dozen- is Tinder still a thing? Hmmmm... I can't think of any I'm confident would not like to jump my bones, now tha you ask. Damn! As for fuck buddies... maybe I'm just too demanding. (Like Prince LOL, but he doesn't lack fuck buddies.) I haven't tried Tinder, but I think I'd be bad at it. I'm too *something.* Unpracticed? Honest? Intense? Some combo of things like that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Rey Posted April 2, 2016 Report Share Posted April 2, 2016 I don't think platonic friendships (close friendships, not aquaintances or work partners) between attracting sexes exist. I would love to think so, but from my experience, I and people I know have not experienced it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bambithebimbo Posted April 2, 2016 Report Share Posted April 2, 2016 Dear Ms. Kang! I think a platonic relationship can exist. But, even with my limited experience, the timer starts ticking as soon as it starts. Sooner or later one of the two willl be wanting more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manpeach Posted April 4, 2016 Report Share Posted April 4, 2016 I have a platonic relationship with every girl in my yoga class. Damn ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted April 4, 2016 Report Share Posted April 4, 2016 I have a platonic relationship with every girl in my yoga class. Damn ! Bradley: You sound like Jimmy Carter who committed adultery in his heart many times. The question refers to two people who commit to each other but exclude sex from their relationship. It is true that I fantasize sex with many women I see but the deeper bond of friendship and commitment does not exist. It is really about partners who are capable of having sex with each other but don't but who also have sex with no one else. Dannyboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted April 4, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2016 I think its about setting expectations. I have plenty of friendships that are strictly platonic, even as I find them attractive. I just don't need to go there with them. They fulfill me in other ways; intellectually, spiritually, civicly, or professionally. I don't need to go to them to find romance and I have no expectations (or desire, really) to expand my relationship with them beyond that. This is a fresh perspective and setting expectations is a great way to put it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted April 4, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2016 Dear Ms. Kang! I think a platonic relationship can exist. But, even with my limited experience, the timer starts ticking as soon as it starts. Sooner or later one of the two willl be wanting more. Are you summarizing your relationships as ticking time bombs? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bambithebimbo Posted April 4, 2016 Report Share Posted April 4, 2016 Are you summarizing your relationships as ticking time bombs? Hahaha! I think I do! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ctyankeex2 Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 It started out that way and changed for the better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manpeach Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 Bradley: You sound like Jimmy Carter who committed adultery in his heart many times. The question refers to two people who commit to each other but exclude sex from their relationship. It is true that I fantasize sex with many women I see but the deeper bond of friendship and commitment does not exist. It is really about partners who are capable of having sex with each other but don't but who also have sex with no one else. Dannyboy Dannyboy Unlike Jimmy Carter, I have aslo committed adultery with my hand Thanks for clearing up the question for me Professor MP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jung's Jewboy Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 Can a truly platonic relationship exist between two people of attracting sexual preferences exist? Do you believe you have one? Have you tried having one? I am confused by the question. When you say 'if attracting sexual preferences exist' are you asking can one have a platonic relationship exist if you are attracted to the other person. My friendships with women have run the gamut. I have and have had long term friendships with women. Some I have been attracted to and some not. In cases where I have harbored an attraction there were times it was manageable and times that it became too hard to manage (NPI). In the latter case there were instances where the woman definitely worked me good. Be careful what you wish for and what you are attracted to! When you are a submissive by nature and attracted to narcissistic women it can be a recipe for frustration - which is its own reward. LOL. In short, it is possible and I have been lucky enough to enjoy friendships with women. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jung's Jewboy Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 Bradley: You sound like Jimmy Carter who committed adultery in his heart many times. The question refers to two people who commit to each other but exclude sex from their relationship. It is true that I fantasize sex with many women I see but the deeper bond of friendship and commitment does not exist. It is really about partners who are capable of having sex with each other but don't but who also have sex with no one else. Dannyboy Was that really what MJK was asking? I don't think she was asking about friends who are essentially celibate couples. Not clear how you took that away from her query! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jung's Jewboy Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 I don't think platonic friendships (close friendships, not aquaintances or work partners) between attracting sexes exist. I would love to think so, but from my experience, I and people I know have not experienced it! I may be wrong but I think it's fair to say that Fortress staff are probably not a representative sample of women at large as far as this question goes. I can imagine most people in their circles and outside of them are drawn to them in a way that makes a platonic relationship challenging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted April 5, 2016 Report Share Posted April 5, 2016 Was that really what MJK was asking? I don't think she was asking about friends who are essentially celibate couples. Not clear how you took that away from her query! JJB: Well, it's really in the operation of Ms. Kang's mind that the question was formulated so her meaning is known to her and the rest of us can us our own devices to venture an answer. The definition of Platonic can be loose or strict. The looser we interpret it the less meaning we can ascribe to the question. I think Ms. Kang wants to know whether a committed couple, fully capable of sexual intercourse, could truly enjoy a non-sexual committed relationship. I don't think she's asking if one likes a co-worker or is otherwise associated with another, but does not allow for the possibility of sex, that the connection is Platonic and successful. I am not going to study Plato's works to be sure of what he meant but I assume he believed that one could share love with another but shun sex as it will bring them closer to Godliness in their connection. Who cares if I secretly want to fuck the next door neighbor but never try. That is not Platonic. But if she divorces her husband and runs off with me under the condition that we never have sex in the pursuit of a true and pure relationship I think Ms. Kang would be curious if that kind of relationship can exist and survive. Your thoughts? Dannyboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wild willie Posted April 6, 2016 Report Share Posted April 6, 2016 I guess by my defintion <yeah iam a poor speller> I have been in this kind of relationship with a Lady for many years we see each other 2 times a month never had sex or anything like that. We go out to talk about poerty books and religion at the end of the night we hug and she goes home alone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.