“It’s in your eyes. I’ve seen you become evil.”

[Mistress Dalisay]

These words were spoken to me, and they’ve haunted me for some time.

What look could they have possibly seen?

I see my reflection every day and think nothing of it. But then I realized I’ve never experienced myself.

As a Mistress, we provide a show of our capabilities. However, there are moments when I know I’ve stepped aside and let my body speak for me.

One question: Who is she? What does she want? And why have I only noticed her when I play?

It feels as if, once I unknowingly decide to let go, a monster lurks in the shadows, waiting for any chance to emerge.

Have you seen her? Even a glimpse?

I’d like to know who I’m working with… for your own safety.

Edited February 23 by Mistress Dalisay

[franknot]

1 hour ago, Mistress Dalisay said:

These words were spoken to me, and they’ve haunted me for some time.

What look could they have possibly seen?

One question: Who is she? What does she want? And why have I only noticed her when I play?

 

My initial thought is 'Eye of the Beholder' .. Isn't all 'play'  'Role-Play' to some extent? 
So it's your role-character that needs to be resolved.
But every sub will be seeing a different 'You'.. depending upon the intensity of the session and the weight and amount of power that is being exchanged.
Perhaps it's not you, it's the value of what they're hiding that determines the creature they see.

The more precious their secret .. the more fear in their eyes.
You be You .. that's why they're there.

[risotto]

Surely a big part of play is letting out parts of yourself that might be dangerous, might be unpleasant, might be unlikable, might be socially unacceptable, but in a safe, contained environment?  Knowing where the monsters are is a kind of power.

[Mistress Dalisay]

2 hours ago, franknot said:

My initial thought is 'Eye of the Beholder' .. Isn't all 'play'  'Role-Play' to some extent? 
So it's your role-character that needs to be resolved.
But every sub will be seeing a different 'You'.. depending upon the intensity of the session and the weight and amount of power that is being exchanged.
Perhaps it's not you, it's the value of what they're hiding that determines the creature they see.

The more precious their secret .. the more fear in their eyes.
You be You .. that's why they're there.

The line between who I am inside the Fortress and who I am beyond it has never felt so vast.

Perhaps you are right about each of you experiencing a different “creature”. Perfect choice of wording as I believe she may be such.

I once assumed it was all merely an extension of my present self, the self at ease. Yet I am beginning to understand that each of you unlocks something distinct within me. 

And this “me” I speak of will, in time, reconcile with the Dominatrix I already am. I may simply need to grant her freedom.

[Mistress Dalisay]

1 hour ago, risotto said:

Surely a big part of play is letting out parts of yourself that might be dangerous, might be unpleasant, might be unlikable, might be socially unacceptable, but in a safe, contained environment?  Knowing where the monsters are is a kind of power.

She must be released somehow somewhere. But can these walls contain what I have yet to encounter?

[GentlemanRoleplayer]

20 hours ago, Mistress Dalisay said:

The line between who I am inside the Fortress and who I am beyond it has never felt so vast.

"Well, we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and show ourselves
When everyone has gone
Some are satin, some are steel
Some are silk and some are leather
They're the faces of a stranger
But we'd love to try them on...."

https://genius.com/Billy-joel-the-stranger-lyrics

 

[AioriaRegulus]

In this sub's view, it is one of many reflections of the self... It is part of what makes your true person.  Reflections must to heard, felt and/or acknowledged. It is only when that doesn't happen that a reflection can turn into a monster. That monster begins to rage if it continues to get ignored, but conversely reverts back to a proper reflection if it receives its outlet.

Whether it is within the walls of this fortress, your private sanctuary, a combination or none of the above, It goes without saying... and certainly without this sub's saying... but I am confident that whatever was seen in Mistress's eyes that prompted that comment is as wonderful as it is a foundational part of you.