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Question of Loyalty


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On 5/4/2018 at 1:42 PM, Dannyboy said:

Dear Ms. Kang:

It seems that I already sent in a reply but it is nowhere to be found. I will try my best to recapture what I said.

I go by a certain code. I have been privy to certain personal and private information about a number of Mistresses over the years. I am honor bound to keep secrets even if I no longer session with any of those Mistresses. Any Mistess who tries to get me to talk about things deemed private or secret will lose me as a client if my firm no is unacceptable.

I can think of a hypothetical situation in which a Mistress could interfere with my vanilla life, for instance, and that would invalidate the sense of honor between us. Since it hasn't happened so far I doubt it will ever happen in my lifetime. 

Now if I ever wrote my memoirs I would have to disguise the identities of the Ladies to protect them. Jessy Kang would be someone obscure like "the tall, busty, blonde, Chinese Mistrees who has her own dungeon in Chinatown and who is referred to by her Chinese name by her landlord." In that way I would preserve her secrecy and still tell my story.

Dannyboy 

I've never doubted your allegiance to the Samurai code.

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On 5/4/2018 at 6:19 PM, questionmarks said:

Tough question, MJK! A few years ago I would've said categorically no, but I've learned to loosen my grip on my sense of ideals and morals a bit. Commitments and loyalty are very important, but I'm not living in a vacuum, and I'm not always my own best guide. Relationships are collaborative, and if someone I love and trust is pushing me out of my comfort zone, it's arrogant not to at least consider that I'm being foolish. It's impossible, of course, to really know how I'd respond to these two imaginary individuals, and without embodying the way I'd encounter myself in relation to them, but I think I can say this: If not divulging seemed genuinely to hurt Mistress B, and I didn't think it would hurt Mistress A other than the fact of breach of the commitment, then the answer to your question would likely be yes.

Is that still a cop-out?

Not a cop out at all! I respect your answer. It's honest and very realistic, as Mistress Zito pointed out. 

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On ‎5‎/‎5‎/‎2018 at 12:56 PM, Mistress Alexia Zito said:

I like this response, it’s realistic and takes the complicated emotions of the dilemma into account. When someone is submitting they are usually more pliable, and even likely to do something that would be a hard “no” in a less charged situation and I don’t think that is limited to just a session activity. While I think remaining strong in the face of such pressure to betray a loyalty to Mistress A is the objective “right thing to do,” I think many more would be tempted to divulge than are willing to admit out loud. 

I agree with you Mistress Zito. I would like to think I would be loyal to Mistress A. In all reality, under heavy pressure I would probably fold and not only divulge the information but also blurt out "i'm a monkey's uncle and the money is in the backyard!"

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21 hours ago, Mistress Kang said:

Not a cop out at all! I respect your answer. It's honest and very realistic, as Mistress Zito pointed out. 

Thanks, HM, I appreciate that a lot.

On 5/5/2018 at 12:56 PM, Mistress Alexia Zito said:

I like this response, it’s realistic and takes the complicated emotions of the dilemma into account. When someone is submitting they are usually more pliable, and even likely to do something that would be a hard “no” in a less charged situation and I don’t think that is limited to just a session activity. While I think remaining strong in the face of such pressure to betray a loyalty to Mistress A is the objective “right thing to do,” I think many more would be tempted to divulge than are willing to admit out loud. 

Ty Mistress Zito ! Sometimes it's hard to treat a hypothetical like a real emotional experiment, rather than a question of principle or logic. But I find them more compelling when I can come closer to embodying them.

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19 hours ago, Mistress Justine Shankar said:

Appreciating all the loyalty here ;) I personally believe confidence is confidence, and another Mistress who’s intent on betraying another Mistress’ tryst reflects poorly on her. 

Also, why true secrets of mine stay secret.

Dear Ms. Shankar:

Mistress's tryst? Sounds juicy or did you misspell trust?

Dannyboy

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On 5/6/2018 at 3:52 PM, Mistress Kang said:

I've never doubted your allegiance to the Samurai code.

Hai! Jo O sama. Yoroshiku onegai shimasu.

Once upon a time I was told something about a Mistress. I was also told that another Mistress could confirm that fact for me. At a restaurant I posed the question. She struggled a moment and replied that she could not answer the question. She was Japanese and knew the code of bushido well. Although slightly disappointed I praised her for honoring the code as well. I also believed the "rumor" but never uttered it or posted it anywhere.

Dannyboy

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On 5/6/2018 at 8:18 PM, Mistress Justine Shankar said:

Appreciating all the loyalty here ;) I personally believe confidence is confidence, and another Mistress who’s intent on betraying another Mistress’ tryst reflects poorly on her. 

Also, why true secrets of mine stay secret.

What! Even after many years of his loyal servitude you don't think you would reveal some true secrets?

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On 5/4/2018 at 4:04 AM, jpcpat said:

I would tell Mistress B that I keep confidences as a matter of personal integrity, not loyalty. If Mistress B kept pushing, it would be the last time we played. If a mistress expects me to betray other's secrets, I start wondering about what confidences of mine she might be willing to betray 

I agree with this response. It's none of Mistress's B business! 

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On 5/9/2018 at 11:37 PM, Mistress Kang said:

What! Even after many years of his loyal servitude you don't think you would reveal some true secrets?

Hahaha, depends on the sub, and on how sensitive the information is! I can imagine doing so in a long-term scenario where trust has been built organically.

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12 hours ago, Mistress Rey said:

I agree with this response. It's none of Mistress's B business! 

If it's as simple as someone demanding intel on someone else just because, or something like that, then I agree with you and everyone saying it'd be none of her business. But for me, this scenario only works if I imagine it *is* her business, in some manner or other. It's hard for me to imagine feeling that loyalty and care towards someone who would demand I break a confidence just for the fuck of it. I've been in situations when I've agreed to keep something to myself for X, but doing so wound up being cruel to Y and yet doing X no real favors, and I had to make a judgment call beyond a simplistic principle. Relationships—and we ourselves—are often so much more richly contoured than the principles we imagine ourselves living by. 

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I would of course respect Mistress A, and never betray her confidence. If Mistress B wouldn't respect that, I would start looking for

Mistress C. ;)

 

Actually, just the fact that Mistress B asked me to reveal the info would probably prompt my search for Mistress C. 

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