Jump to content

Sadism v. Masochism


Recommended Posts

I am very curious if there's a Kinsey scale for Sadism and Masochism.

For myself, I embody both desires, but definitely one more than the other. And I know a few subs who also top, but to which degree, I'm not sure.

 

So all you subs.. do you ever have sadistic desires? And how do you deal with them?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 50
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

No sadistic desires here. Just an overwhelming desire to please an Asian Mistress by either taking pain, providing pleasure or whatever she wants. I would assume by your stature that your desires lean towards Sadism but where are you on the scale? Is it better for a sub with no sadistic desires to be matched with a Domme that has overwhelming sadistic desires?

 

Also wondering if having some masochistic desires serves to make you a better domme. My bet is yes.

 

Very interesting topic for sure Mistress Zhao.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm almost totally dom, but gladly submit to the will of a beautiful and fascinating young lady. The main difference is I don't fantasize about submission, it's more like I'm turned on by the idea that such a creature would want to focus her attention on me...she just happens to want to take it in a different direction. I think nearly any male who's enchanted by a lady will damn near let her pound nails into his head if she clearly enjoys it.

 

I do fantasize about being on top and meting out punishment alternating with the loving caress. But since all the ladies who switch are primarily dom I will always do joint switch sessions: I want my mistress to be herself, to experience both sides of her. I feel insisting on a pure sub session would stifle her personality.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am very curious if there's a Kinsey scale for Sadism and Masochism.

For myself, I embody both desires, but definitely one more than the other. And I know a few subs who also top, but to which degree, I'm not sure.

 

So all you subs.. do you ever have sadistic desires? And how do you deal with them?

I prefer masochism I'd say im more creative and better off that way honestly I dont see myself being a male domme or master
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am very curious if there's a Kinsey scale for Sadism and Masochism.

For myself, I embody both desires, but definitely one more than the other. And I know a few subs who also top, but to which degree, I'm not sure.

 

So all you subs.. do you ever have sadistic desires? And how do you deal with them?

 

Ha ha, M. Zhao, I love this post. I truly enjoy both sides of the equation.

 

As my Mistress knows, I only am a submissive inside the FF. I think it's like being bisexual; those of us that "go both ways" just enjoy life on a higher plane. Besides, how could I know the true pleasure my subby girls enjoy if I've never taken the punishment myself? That's why my Mistress (she knows who she is) is so extraordinary- she's been able to "tame" me inside the walls of the FF at least, and girls outside should thank her for how she's made me a better master.

 

I think the BEST, world-class mistresses either switch openly (or secretly, like M. Kang does). How else would they excel at play?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am very curious if there's a Kinsey scale for Sadism and Masochism.

For myself, I embody both desires, but definitely one more than the other. And I know a few subs who also top, but to which degree, I'm not sure.

 

So all you subs.. do you ever have sadistic desires? And how do you deal with them?

 

I hurt someones feelings once :P

 

tw

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I play at the fortress, I am almost entirely submissive. In real life relationships, it has been my fate to not only be the dominant partner (in non-sexual dimensions) but to be the source of mental, emotional and financial support to such an extent that it threatened(ens) to suck the life out of me. I long for a real life relationship where I am allowed to be vulnerable and taken in some dimensions and aspects while also being allowed to take the lead where I have the comparative advantage (to put it in economics terms). Haven't gotten there yet, but I reckon I have at least a few grains of sand in the hourglass left to get this shit right. One of these days. . . . .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I must say mZ, I don't ever have sadistic desires, except maybe to bite someone's fine behind ;) . I would be the worst top ever, especially when I would ever consider the idea of doing so with you, mChoi, or mJung. There would be a force field preventing me from ever doing anything to cause you pain.

 

Now, the other way around is fairly limited too, except I do certainly enjoy making you all happy and will endure to great lengths for that happiness, if you so desired.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm almost totally dom, but gladly submit to the will of a beautiful and fascinating young lady. The main difference is I don't fantasize about submission, it's more like I'm turned on by the idea that such a creature would want to focus her attention on me...she just happens to want to take it in a different direction. I think nearly any male who's enchanted by a lady will damn near let her pound nails into his head if she clearly enjoys it.

 

I do fantasize about being on top and meting out punishment alternating with the loving caress. But since all the ladies who switch are primarily dom I will always do joint switch sessions: I want my mistress to be herself, to experience both sides of her. I feel insisting on a pure sub session would stifle her personality.

 

I agree with what you wrote. There are many shades of domination and submission. I enjoy both. I do think that there is a difference between being a 'submissive' and having a submissive fetish of kink. It's kind of like having a submissive urge but it's not fully encompassing

 

siggy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't think I would rate high on the sadist scale because I don't really get sexual pleasure from other's pain. I'm not much of a masochist either. My threshhold for pain is low and its something I just endure for the sake of fun. I enjoy more so being submissive. On the s/m scale my score might be low but on the kinky freak scale I'm probably off the charts :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would be the worst top ever, especially when I would ever consider the idea of doing so with you, mChoi, or mJung. There would be a force field preventing me from ever doing anything to cause you pain.

 

My response to the same conflict is yes, I hurt'em, then I want to hug'em and rub their cute sore bottoms...and then I want to hurt'em again and start it all over again. I get such a surge of love for them when they submit to being hurt I just can't help but stop and cuddle/caress. Twisted really, but around here that's nothing new.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mistress Zhao,

I identify as a switch and have for quite a few years although I used to bottom exclusively. Having said that, my fantasies center around masochism and submission, and I've always wondered whether topping/sadistic pleasure comes from causing painful or uncomfortable sensations to a bottom or experiencing them empathetically. And I think it is possibel to appreciate and worship a beautiful partner both from the perspective of bottom and top:) Its definitely a matter of maintaining the balance between yin and yang for me. I get far fewer opportunities to bottom outside of the FF so my scales are presently tipped heavily in the masochistic direction. There's no telling how deep they will go by the time I ring the bell at #19;)

LW

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No sadistic desires here. Just an overwhelming desire to please an Asian Mistress by either taking pain, providing pleasure or whatever she wants. I would assume by your stature that your desires lean towards Sadism but where are you on the scale? Is it better for a sub with no sadistic desires to be matched with a Domme that has overwhelming sadistic desires?

 

Also wondering if having some masochistic desires serves to make you a better domme. My bet is yes.

 

Very interesting topic for sure Mistress Zhao.

 

 

Based on the standard doctor's pain scale- how much pain would bear inflicted by such a lovely lady?

pain.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm almost totally dom, but gladly submit to the will of a beautiful and fascinating young lady. The main difference is I don't fantasize about submission, it's more like I'm turned on by the idea that such a creature would want to focus her attention on me...she just happens to want to take it in a different direction. I think nearly any male who's enchanted by a lady will damn near let her pound nails into his head if she clearly enjoys it.

 

I do fantasize about being on top and meting out punishment alternating with the loving caress. But since all the ladies who switch are primarily dom I will always do joint switch sessions: I want my mistress to be herself, to experience both sides of her. I feel insisting on a pure sub session would stifle her personality.

 

I know the ladies always appreciate considerate tops and switches- you sound like you're one :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am very curious if there's a Kinsey scale for Sadism and Masochism.

For myself, I embody both desires, but definitely one more than the other. And I know a few subs who also top, but to which degree, I'm not sure.

 

So all you subs.. do you ever have sadistic desires? And how do you deal with them?

 

I would find myself extremely low on the sadistic scale. I do like to switch since I get such a thrill at having the tables turned on me, but once in the submissive role, that is where my real gratification arises from.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have an online friend who operates in darkweb territory and sent me a link of the Luka Magnotta snuff film and to tell you the truth I had no interest in lookng at it and this was about a week before it hit worldwide news. It's probably the most sadistic stuff I've ever seen as I scanned through it FF. It actually bored me. I'm at that point in my life where I just don't care to be reminded of what terrible things humans do to other humans. Call it denial or willfull ignorance if you want.

 

Now on the other hand I was at NYC Sapphire over the wekend and one of the strippers tied me up with a curtain rope and IT WAS HAWT. We both really got off on it and the stripper actually gave me her number afterwards. That was the first time I was ever tied up like that and loved it. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No sadistic desires here. Just an overwhelming desire to please an Asian Mistress by either taking pain, providing pleasure or whatever she wants. I would assume by your stature that your desires lean towards Sadism but where are you on the scale? Is it better for a sub with no sadistic desires to be matched with a Domme that has overwhelming sadistic desires?

 

Also wondering if having some masochistic desires serves to make you a better domme. My bet is yes.

 

Very interesting topic for sure Mistress Zhao.

 

I am certainly sadistic, borderline sexual sadistic. But just like anybody else, I get a giggle out of seeing someone fall down the stairs. Don't you?

And I think I agree with many others that given the right person/circumstance, I would gladly submit to the right person if we had that sort of chemistry. I do think that understanding the full gamut of the spectrum makes one a better equipped for anything.

 

Ha ha, M. Zhao, I love this post. I truly enjoy both sides of the equation.

 

As my Mistress knows, I only am a submissive inside the FF. I think it's like being bisexual; those of us that "go both ways" just enjoy life on a higher plane. Besides, how could I know the true pleasure my subby girls enjoy if I've never taken the punishment myself? That's why my Mistress (she knows who she is) is so extraordinary- she's been able to "tame" me inside the walls of the FF at least, and girls outside should thank her for how she's made me a better master.

 

I think the BEST, world-class mistresses either switch openly (or secretly, like M. Kang does). How else would they excel at play?

 

I'm not so sure Mistress Kang secretly switches. I think her keen sense of sadism is uniquely innate and having sociopathic tendencies doesn't hurt either ;)

 

I agree with what you wrote. There are many shades of domination and submission. I enjoy both. I do think that there is a difference between being a 'submissive' and having a submissive fetish of kink. It's kind of like having a submissive urge but it's not fully encompassing

 

siggy

 

This is what I'm referring to..but on the sadistic side for you regular subs. So far, it seems that most of you focus on being the submissive without too much thought as to what it would be like if the tables were turned. That a lovely young masochistic lady would want to submit to you. But so be it. A tree doesn't dream of being a bird.

 

My response to the same conflict is yes, I hurt'em, then I want to hug'em and rub their cute sore bottoms...and then I want to hurt'em again and start it all over again. I get such a surge of love for them when they submit to being hurt I just can't help but stop and cuddle/caress. Twisted really, but around here that's nothing new.

 

This sounds like my kinda ride!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have an online friend who operates in darkweb territory and sent me a link of the Luka Magnotta snuff film and to tell you the truth I had no interest in lookng at it and this was about a week before it hit worldwide news. It's probably the most sadistic stuff I've ever seen as I scanned through it FF. It actually bored me. I'm at that point in my life where I just don't care to be reminded of what terrible things humans do to other humans. Call it denial or willfull ignorance if you want.

 

Now on the other hand I was at NYC Sapphire over the wekend and one of the strippers tied me up with a curtain rope and IT WAS HAWT. We both really got off on it and the stripper actually gave me her number afterwards. That was the first time I was ever tied up like that and loved it. :)

 

I had no idea this snuff film was in circulation. It's a part of life, albeit a part that I wouldn't condone or engage in either, mongoose.

And I think it's an important prerogative to ignore certain things, for it weakens its power over us.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know if I can consider myself a sadist or masochist, really, more of a fetish enthusiast. I enjoy the give and take of control, at least in my personal sexual life. Normally, I'm a pretty aggressive person and probably borderline psycho (at least my thoughts are), but I like to be submissive at the Fortress. I think dominating one of the Fortress Ladies would feel a bit contrived to me, actually.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am certainly sadistic, borderline sexual sadistic. But just like anybody else, I get a giggle out of seeing someone fall down the stairs. Don't you?

And I think I agree with many others that given the right person/circumstance, I would gladly submit to the right person if we had that sort of chemistry. I do think that understanding the full gamut of the spectrum makes one a better equipped for anything.

 

 

 

I'm not so sure Mistress Kang secretly switches. I think her keen sense of sadism is uniquely innate and having sociopathic tendencies doesn't hurt either ;)

 

 

 

This is what I'm referring to..but on the sadistic side for you regular subs. So far, it seems that most of you focus on being the submissive without too much thought as to what it would be like if the tables were turned. That a lovely young masochistic lady would want to submit to you. But so be it. A tree doesn't dream of being a bird.

 

 

 

This sounds like my kinda ride!

 

Maybe there is a desire there but buried so deep that it would need the right partner and chemistry to bring it to life. I did have a very athletic girlfriend in the distant past that would enjoy testing her physical abilities against me. Of course, as a submissive, I welcomed that aggression from her and would even aid in my destruction by blindly walking in to an excruciating head scissor that I knew I could not escape from. She enjoyed having me in a vulnerable position and would require a lot of begging and promises prior to my release.

 

Every now and then, though, the male instinct would kick in and I would get her into a position from which she could not escape. I would pull her panties down and admire her female form for a few minutes, even plant a few kisses, before finishing with a barrage of bare handed swats. She would eventually give up but that was not really what I was after. I was anticipating that there would be further consequences when she turned the table back and I might just be forced to worship the ass that I had just pinked.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On the subject of turning the tables, I've not had the good fortune of having a sexual partner who was secure enough in herself to let me be very sexually dominant toward her. Thus, this side of me has remained latent and dormant. II know myself and what lurks in my heart and mind, however. I have fantasized about dominating women quite often and given my exploration of my submissive side, II believe that I'd know just how to fry a submissive woman's brain, if one ever let me get my hands on her. The big picture would most likely be that with such a woman, I'd like to trade off. It's all hypothetical and just talk, however, until I find a partner comfortable with herself enough to truly experiment. My tendency, for good and for bad and sometimes to a fault, is to focus on giving her what she wants. So, if she wants to be taken and she she wants me to do her, I'll give it to her until it's coming jout of her ears. :-0

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...