ConsentOptional

I brought the magazines and wine per her instructions. It's surprisingly relaxing just to be useful for a while. I don't recall whether I was gagged. But wouldn't have minded; didn't need to talk.

Assembled exercise equipment while she read magazines and watched tv. In a bodystocking and chastity device.

I first tied myself up at 5 o 6 years old. It was naptime and I wrapped myself with a few belts to pin my arms to the side and force my legs together. That drug of divine helplessness was there from a pre-sexual age (if there is such a thing). It's now a magnet dragged along through the years and picking up other fetishes that entail helplessness. Nonconsensualism, forced feminization, forced consumption. But starting from whatever is only freed in my brain after I have been tied up.

Indelible music.

Lisbeth Salander. Brilliant, cunning, lethal.

Babylon Berlin, currently on Netflix, centers on a desperate search for a BDSM video that is being used to bribe the mayor of Cologne in 1920s Germany. Captures both the crushing poverty and the incredible decadence of the years leading up to the rise of nazism. Beautifully done.

I think it's an especially good place for novices. First, because these are real dominatrices. You've thought about this for a long time. You don't want to share that first experience to someone who hasn't. Because we've had a long purely psychological (vs physical) experience of BDSM before we ever session, we often think we can handle more than we can or that we'll like certain things more than it turns out we do. Or that we absolutely don't want to try things that later turn out to be quite high on the hotness scale. For all that, you need someone who is committed to the craft. They'll be reading you, and you need to be read. Speaking of reading - look around, interact. It's a highly articulate group. Yes, they are comfortable handling long-term players. But you don't have to be one. Novice cherry-breaking with sensitivity, style and enthusiasm will be freely offered. I would seriously consider doing 2 hours rather than 1 if you can. Much to explore. Have fun.

Before Matt Groening hit the upper stratosphere with The Simpsons, he had a strip called Life In Hell, which appeared in the Village Voice among other places, and was incidentally the first syndicated strip (I think) with a gay couple. In any event, one of the most famous frames was one-eared Bongo looking up at his two-eared father Binky in a trashed room and saying....

2 episodes in and totally hooked. That naughty, naughty Weimar Republic. Love how they slip in bits of incidental Roxy Music.

Expectation. Openly stated or implied that "Nothing I do to you is humiliating. It is to be expected because of what you are and who I am and what I can make you do." From there, being beat up, spit on, bitch-slapped, sluttified - is your lot in life. You aren't even allowed to feel humiliated, because you aren't "being taken down a peg." It's just how things are. And that is humiliating. Or it would be if you weren't you and She weren't She.

Sex on a beach. Overrated. Sand is a terrible bed - no give. Sex in a car in a city park. A few different ways and times. Not really an exhibitionist thing. Just impulsive. Like Danny says, the steamed glass is your best friend. But if the question is "done to you" vs mutual, that would be an hj at a lake. Chest deep in water, but lots of folks frolicking around. My girlfriend just reached into my swimming suit, and so on.. Domme things. Sexy is in the eye of the beholder. But I always find tokens of dominant control sexy AF.... Sent home: plugged, plugged with a vibrator, with panties in my mouth, not told I'm still wearing lipstick (I tend to be in a daze when the session ends). Never more than one at a time I don't think. Making me go to the mens roomin the office to take and send a pic to prove I was wearing panties... One other - sort of. I used to come into the office in the morning and play my messages on speaker. Multi-tasking, and usually early enough so not many people would be disturbed. One day there's a message from a domme, about what she's going to do and what she wants to know. Somehow I got a few feet from my desk, don't remember why. So about 4 or 5 sentences of this are playing in the office. No one ever said anything to me about it. Who knows...

Nah. Scout is played by someone who's 30. Which is to start by taking the essential power of the story - how evil looks to children and to what extent can adults can guide them - and throwing it out the window. Broadway, like Hollywood most of the time, is fundamentally lazy. Brilliant, but lazy.

NYC Spy Museum mayhaps? Cocktail reception every Friday 6-10. Lots of positive feedback on Yelp and Tripadvisor. Interesting activities for the James Bond(age) Femmes Fatales and Interrogatrices of FF.

The Producers - Gene Wilder and Zero Mostel hatching the plot to produce a flop on Broadway.

Nope. Someone gave me a copy but I haven't gotten to it. I would have to steel myself for Atticus Finch's fall from grace.

Yes, pre-communication would be key. But dominance is an essence. Can be words, thoughts, actions. A fragrance. A look. A series of looks. "You're taking this well, but it's far from over." "You're in more trouble than you could possibly imagine." "I own your body and will do what I please with it. Your 'permission' is not a factor." "You will wear that outfit and perform the depraved acts that come with it." "When I'm done you will be auctioned to the highest bidder. So we are here to raise your selling price." You may never hear any of those words. But they are often discernible without being spoken. Or maybe you'll just get one or two sentences to carry you through the experience. Either way, we're all here in part because words have their limits. And I say that as a lover of words. But has a domme ever lightly run her gloved fingertips over the fresh welts she has produced on your flesh? It's an appreciation and approval of you as a canvas, and it will stay with you a very long time to have been the source of that approval and appreciation. Words could accompany it. But wouldn't really add to it.

Any thoughts on sessions with minimal communication? Just a few direct commands where needed. Open, hands behind your back, on your knees. No more than the necessary minimum. Feels very hot, very dominant, but also very intimate - to need so little communication. And to offer so little. I don't see it as cold or cold-hearted session at all. It's just moving the communication to a different level.

Just re-watched. In keeping with the wonderfully twisted humor of that series it's kind of their "holiday episode." Irene Adler: I'd have you over this desk until you begged for mercy twice. Sherlock: I've never begged for mercy in my life. Irene Adler: Twice.

I don't know if it's laziness that often. Some guys probably like knowing they can just reach up and free themselves; they don't want the experience to be too immersive. I'm just the opposite. I like knowing there's not a damn thing I can do. That said, basic understanding of bondage - how to really secure someone with whatever is available, sustainable positions, etc - is one of the sharp dividing lines between someone who is toying with the idea of being dominant and an actual domme. Flogging/whipping is another. When all is said and done they're crafts and one either takes them seriously or they don't. As you say, the default setting at FF is real bondage.